You’re freshly in love and still have your rose-colored glasses on – everything is wonderful. But does the blazing flame of passion also have the potential for a long relationship? Ask yourself the relationship test with 10 criteria by which you can tell if your love has a future.
It would be too nice if you could take a look into the crystal ball right at the beginning of a new relationship…. Does it work this time? What is the future of the newly flared love? Is she/he perhaps this time actually the long looked for partner for the life?
There is no sure-fire way to find out and no ultimate relationship test. The development of a relationship can no more be determined 100% than stock prices or the weather. But as with these topics, there are certainly methods for arriving at a good assessment.
This may sound a bit unromantic, because: Shouldn’t you rather enjoy the moment and just let the future come to you? In the initial phase of a relationship, definitely yes. Too much thinking, checking and weighing is out of place. Instead, you should simply let yourself be carried by the wave of passion and let the butterflies in your stomach fly free.
But at the latest when you think about moving in together, it is not only allowed, but also advisable to think about the future of the relationship. What do you expect? Can you imagine spending the rest of your life with your new partner? How well do you really fit together?
The following 10 questions are a relationship test that will give you a good indication of whether your partnership has the potential for a really long relationship. After all, love alone is usually not enough, unfortunately.
1. How Well Do You Harmonize Sexually?
OK, let’s talk turkey: a strong sexual attraction is indispensable for a functioning relationship. Sure, sex is by no means everything in a relationship, but if the sexual component is omitted – you can finally call the whole thing a friendship.
So far so good, but even the strongest erotic attraction does not make for good sex. And that is also damn important. What exactly is good sex, there are as many opinions as there are people in the world. Everyone has their own sexual needs (how often, how long, which practices), erotic fantasies and, of course, limits.
The better these needs harmonize in two people, the more likely the passion will remain and form the foundation for a long relationship.
2. Do You Have the Same Degree of Need for Physical Contact?
Similar to the topic of sex, when it comes to cuddling, kissing, holding hands, the most important thing is that both partners tick about the same in the process. Does she want to cuddle and smooch all the time, but it’s way too much for him? bad sign.
If, on the other hand, both are very cuddly, or not, that’s a good sign. Even in a long relationship, the chance is then much lower that one of both misses proximity at some point, or on the contrary feels crushed by it.
3. Can and Do You Want to Open Up to the Other to the Same Extent?
Not only in terms of physical closeness, both partners should be on the same wavelength. Basically, a relationship can only work if both partners are willing to open up to the other and let him or her share their inner life.
However, this does not have to be immediately or completely. A relationship can work wonderfully if both partners rarely talk about feelings, provided that this applies to both of them. But if one has much more need to talk than the other, this becomes a problem in the long run and a real obstacle to a long relationship.
4. How Similar or Different Are Your Life Plans?
She would prefer to travel the whole world, he thinks it’s nicest at home. She dreams of a country house in the countryside, he of a stylish city loft. Her career is the most important thing to her, while he wants to have lots of children and pets one day… Sorry, but you need no relationship test to know this will not work.
5. How Important Is Each of You Professional Career?
I claim: if both partners care more about their career than the relationship, it’s only a matter of time before it breaks. If one supports the other in his professional self-realization and keeps her / his back free already rather. Best, however, both are willing to compromise for the relationship (later perhaps marriage, family…).
6. Do You Both Want Children?
Phew, tough topic. Should there be maximum disagreement between the partners on this…. it looks bleak for a long relationship.
7. How Do Each of You Imagine the Perfect Living Situation for the Future?
Work hard and build a house – not only among Swabians, this is a dream cherished by many Germans. But by no means by everyone: I prefer to remain flexible and live for rent. And even if both partners share the dream of owning their own home, there are still a lot of critical questions: Where should it be located? What should it look like?
8. How Similar or Different Are Your Ideas of Cleanliness and Order?
In the rosy clouds of initial infatuation, such a trivial issue may still seem beside the point. But after a month of living together at the latest, differing views on cleanliness and tidiness can become a serious impediment to a long relationship.
9. Do You Have Common Interests?
At least a few interests should be shared with your partner, so that a long relationship works out. Otherwise, not only the topics of conversation become scarce, there is also the danger at some point to live only past each other. Because if the interests of both partners go in too different directions, it is difficult to find common hobbies and activities or to go on vacation together.
10. What Is the Worst Feature of Your Partner and Can You Live With It? What About the Other Way Around?
You will probably be able to answer this question only after a while, because first of all, in the initial infatuation you block out almost every negative quality of your partner and secondly, everyone automatically hides their weaknesses from each other.
But at some point you know each other so well that you know pretty well what faults the other person has (usually better than you do). In many couples, the phase then begins where one or even both try to re-educate the partner according to their ideas. However, this can quickly go down the drain and even if people can adapt and in some respects may well be changed – certain basic characteristics remain.
Therefore, you have to ask yourself for the final question of the relationship test: can I live with this? Do I put up with him being a dirty pig out of love for my partner? Can I cope with his annoying whining? Can I overlook his stinginess, his laziness, his constant bossiness?
If this is the case and vice versa, your partner can also cope with your biggest weaknesses and you still love each other – then this is the best guarantee for a happy long relationship! 😉
Love, friendship and spending beautiful time together with the people who are important to us: these are the topics on Greatime. On the ideas portal we offer many tips for Quality Time with favorite people through special activities for two, with friends and with children.
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